5/29/2008

The V-grade Bishop Explained

eh, eh, this is funny stuff. I bit out-dated since the grade went up to V16 nowadays, but still.
Made up by John Sherman in 1998:

A practical guide to applying the V-system
V0 A problem you wouldn't admit to doing no matter how cool it was.
V1 A problem you would admit to doing, if it had loose holds, a death landing, and your partner backed off of it.
V2 A problem, if cool enough, that you would recommend to others to prove you're not a ratings snob.
V3 A problem you ruthlessly wire and incorporate into your warm-uproutine, in the hopes that visiting partners will struggle on it.
V4 A problem that might give you trouble, but "Hey, anything below V5 is so easy I can't tell the difference."
V5 A problem, if you were to live in Boulder, Colorado, that you might actually flash.
V6 A problem, if you were to live in Boulder, Colorado, that you would expect your girlfriend to flash.
V7 A problem you fell on repeatedly, but really, you could have flash edit.
V8 A problem you religiously avoid, because you're "saving it for the flash."
V9 A problem you have no chance of flashing.
V10 A problem you knew you could have done, even though your spotter took 10kg off for you, so you counted it anyway.
V11 A problem, if flashed, that you might get free shoes for, but only if you fax the mags this month.
V12 A problem you would do if only your fingers were a bit smaller, yourreach a bit longer, your spotter more attentive, the weather moreamenable, your shoes not so blown out, your elbow not so sore fromtraining, the sun not in your eyes, and you didn't eat that funkytake-out Chinese the night before.
V13 A problem commensurate with your well-published abilities, that you deserve credit for, even though you didn't do it, because as the mags reported, "It was too humid."
V14 A problem only Fred Nicole could do, after you gave him the beta.

(source: www.fishproducts.com)

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